Posted by Maggie
It seems forever since I painted. It has been hard to comprehend that it has been three weeks now since I went to the hospital and this life-shattering chain of events began. But in terms of any connection to art, it seems even longer, though I had a painting on the easel the day it began.
Given all that is going on in my life, I've wondered why I have been so focused that I needed to draw or paint, when I'm also overwhelmed by the need to communicate with my leg, to heal from surgery, and so on.
What I think it is, is that I need to know I still am who I am, and a big part of that has to do with my art. If I can put pencil to paper, hold a brush and apply color, think about form and line and value, then I am reconnecting to who I am and what I do.
My hands shake endlessly. I found on an earlier attempt that I cannot hold a pencil or charcoal or pastel well enough to draw. So tonight, when my sleepless spell began, I decided to try some watercolor. Earlier today, with Bill's help and the use of a walker, I stepped a few feet into the studio to select supplies, so they were at hand and ready.
It did seem easier to handle the brush than to try to hold a pen. I loved just playing with color. I have looked at these particular roses, which are closest to the recliner where I spend most of my time, for the last two or three nights. I like them at midnight, when the fireplace behind them is dark and they silhouette in interesting ways.
I often tell my students they should save the occasional early work so that later they can see their progress. I think that's what some of these sketches will be for me --the record of the changes as I get stronger, and begin to regain some skills.
Midnight Roses, watercolor, 1-12-13.